For a week or two, I’ve been wanting to write about singing.
Nothing could seem more strange, right? I mean, what’s to sing about? Here in Canada, we’ve just experienced a terrifying attack on our Parliament Buildings and the murder of two soldiers in three days. The culprits were freelance terrorists, converts to an extreme form of Islam.
As of this moment, a few billion pixels have already been spilled on this incident and I have little I can add. Only to say that since the summer, I’ve been following the spread of a cruel psychopathy that has swept so much of the Middle East under the guise of profound religious devotion. Profoundly depressing, is more like it. An ache, a crushing rock-weight on the spirit.
Then there’s Ebola, Africa’s tragedy (along with our exaggerated panic in the West). Surely this is bad news at its most heart-rending.
Given the state of the world, I wasn’t in the mood for singing when we drove down to New York City for the long October weekend. However, I brought along a stack of favourite CDs — operatic arias, Middle Eastern folksongs, popular music of the French Renaissance, and my treasured Paul Robeson at Carnegie Hall (1958). In a previous blog, I mentioned that I’ve been a fan of the late basso profundo for decades. His singing embodied dignity and a capacity to rise above violence and injustice. Alive and passionate, his music continues to free the heart of its burdens. It also catches a bad mood off-guard. And so I sang along.
There is a balm in Gilead
to make the wounded whole
Sometimes you don’t know you’re wounded until you sing the words.
As I sang along to the old spiritual, my burden of depression about the world lifted, a weight so familiar that I’d no longer noticed how heavy it was. Perhaps the power of great music lies in the fact that an artist has borne the burden first, has understood and expressed it, has given it back to us — no longer as a burden but as a gift.
Music, I think, is the most direct of all the arts. It strikes the heart before the head can intervene, before we slam shut the iron door of cynicism. On that long drive, the music let me sense how I felt, let me embrace the comfort of a singing voice that knew its way through the darkness.
I’m no stranger to singing. As kids, my sibs and I used to sing in the car, on road trips. Loud. Good grief, we’d harmonize. Those were some of our happiest moments as a family. My parents encouraged this commotion and I think they must have loved it. Many years later, singing in the car sustained my spouse and I on a dark night some weeks after 9/11, driving to my native city and listening to the same music as we made our way toward the ruins. Paul Robeson once again sang us through those long shadows.
It’s not far, just goes by
through an open door —
work all done, carried by,
going to fear no more.
We sang so that we could be brave, so that we’d not feel alone in the darkness that had, for a moment, overcome the world.
And here we were, years later, once again singing through our long night.
Now I know that singing won’t erase the evils in this world. It just happens that I’m a product of the Sixties, with its rich lode of protest songs and anthems, and I know that singing with others brings joy and reassurance. More than that, it’s about imagination. Long ago, singing together freed us to believe that we’d overcome, that we’d help put an end to a terrible war. Perhaps it helped, in some immeasurable way, to do these things. I would like to believe that.
It shouldn’t surprise us that radical fundamentalists (such as the Taliban) do not permit singing.
When we sing, we set hope free.
***
Heads-up, dear readers: on October 29th, I’ll be a guest blogger at The Brockton Reading Series blog (http://brocktonwritersseries.wordpress.com) prior to my reading (from my novella Midsummer) on November 5th. Joining me that evening will be IF the Poet, Sheniz Janmohamed and Zoe Whittall. If you’re in Toronto, please join us at Full of Beans Coffee House & Roastery, 1348 Dundas St. W., Toronto (7pm, PWYC)
The Owl
This magnificent Great Horned Owl is spending the winter in New York’s Central Park. The photo is a “first” for me, a co-operative effort, made through the kind help of a professional nature photographer. Credit for the photo also goes to whatever abiding goodness animates this earth.
It was Christmas Eve, a day that celebrates journeys large and small, guiding stars, the birth of the new. On that day, we took an everyday stroll through ordinary time into a quiet revelation of the numinous.
We’d come to the Ramble, the section of the park where the owl was roosting, but the area was huge, and we couldn’t spot the bird. Then a man with a camera came walking down the path, and we asked him if he knew where the owl was.
“I know where he was the other day,” he said.
Offering to show us, he trekked back the way he came, and we followed him along a hidden path so serpentine that I imagined him walking us back in time — to the moment, as well as to the place where he’d last seen the owl. The path sloped downward toward a clump of trees where another man sat with his camera and telephoto lens mounted on a tripod.
“He’s looking at the owl,” said our guide, who spoke with a Russian accent. He was soon joined by a clutch of Russian-speaking birdwatchers who’d spotted a hawk hunting for snacks at a cluster of bird feeders dangling from the bare trees and crowded with titmice. There were other out-of-towners there, including a number of Americans and a woman from Britain, an avid birder who’d just seen her first Christmas-red cardinal. And then there were the two of us from Toronto — one, a native New Yorker, both observing the scene with wonderment. We stood inside a quiet microcosm of the great world, humming around and above us in the big city beyond this hidden glen.
The photographer was an unhurried man, quiet and patient, sitting a metre away from me in a lounge chair, a remote switch in his hand, his 600mm telephoto trained on the enormous owl high up in the trees. I was astounded to realize that he was someone I knew by reputation, a professional videographer and a denizen of Central Park, whose photo blog I’ve admired for years. (I mentioned him in this blog a year ago).
Feeling wowed to be working alongside him, I got busy photographing the owl. I didn’t have my big telephoto and my 300mm lens wasn’t quite up to the task, but I kept at it while the sleepy-looking raptor opened and shut its huge golden eyes, scratched and preened and turned its back to us. I felt a bit frustrated, but then I watched the photographer who seemed in no hurry, who did his work by waiting in stillness for the majestic bird to reveal itself. I realized then that for every one of the man’s extraordinary online photos, he may have taken dozens less so. He was unpreturbed, prepared to wait, attentive. It seemed as if the beauty of his work arose out of the empty space created by patience and silence.
How apt, I thought , that the run-up to Christmas should be a season known as Advent, the period of waiting.
A man approached the photographer, asking if he could attach his camera to the lens and take some photos. He could, and did.
So now you know how I got my picture.
My photo was also taken with that 600mm telephoto lens. More than that, it was taken through the serendipity of chance encounters and the kindness of a generous man. It felt as if it were taken in a vision. “Now the eyes of my eyes are opened,” wrote e. e. cummings. So was the eye that beheld the owl.
Many eyes. Birders, clustered together in silence, their binos lifted skyward — they embody contemplation and reverence in the presence of mystery and wonder. Observe the grandeur of the Great Horned Owl, and you will know for sure that abiding in the heart of this broken world is a clear and luminous goodness.
Radiant moments of wonder and blessing do happen in our brief lives.
All we can do is embrace them and be thankful.
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